I've realized that apart from being a professional blogger, a professional weight loss champ, and a professional wrestler, I can add professional auditioner to the list of things I will never be. I dabble. One might say I'm a dabbler. I'm okay with this. Today I said out loud that I could never audition as a living. (Meaning, become a professional singer who makes their living from getting gigs after, you guessed it, auditioning.) It is exhausting, to say the very least. I found myself going through the motions this entire trip out to Michigan (the location of the week!) and had to really pull myself together to give as committed a performance as I have the last 2 weekends. I forgot to pack all sorts of ridiculous things like my hair brush, a second shirt, my make up wipes, my phone charger... luckily I had the car charger with me so crisis averted there.
I just felt strange this week. Maybe it was residual jet lag from last week? I ended up cancelling all lessons on Wednesday because I woke up with a bit of a sore throat and made the decision to be a performer, not a teacher, which means my voice comes first. It's also nice to know I'll have Thursdays and Fridays for make ups, so that helps. It turned out to be a great decision because I went back to bed after sending all of the appropriate e-mails and slept until 1:30pm. Obviously my body needs the rest. Last night I slept like absolute crap on a cracker, but it did not negatively affect my singing today.
I mean, can you tell just by what I've typed already that I'm not entirely "with it" right now? I'll skip the "I know this is right for me" because we all know that by now, and that is continually reinforced even as each day goes by. I am constantly reminded either from observing phenomenal teaching, or from feeling the effects of working too hard for too little pay, that this is the right move. So onto the audition!
After getting up this morning and buying a hair brush, I was able to shower and prepare to find this school.
*Shout out to my parents for the wicked awesome GPS I got for xmas. Seriously best gift ever. Followed closely by the decanter. And my wireless drill. And my fuzzy socks. And my board game. Okay, I got some good stuff this xmas, but the GPS has paid itself forward 8 billion times already.*
I get to the building and immediately meet a turkey. A large, wild turkey that the locals cleverly call "Turk" who was chilling on the steps between me and my intended door. Two thoughts simultaneously popped in my head. One was a picture I imagined while listening to a story of an old Denny's friend being chased and pecked at by wild turkeys in Mattydale. The other was my Dad's voice sizing up the turkey, deciding "Turk" looked delicious. Dad's views won out and I cautiously made my way around the turkey who joined me in ascending a few steps but otherwise left me unscathed.
Once I made it to the check-in lobby, everything started looking up. I found the rooms I needed, got a small bite to eat, got a practice room and warmed up, and started the process of the third audition. My rehearsal with the accompanist went smoothly, he was super nice and encouraging, said I'd be a great fit at UMich. That's always nice to hear no matter who it's from. After a quick lunch, I re-warmed up (this was over the span of 2 hours) and headed to my audition room. When it was my turn to sing, I felt the same confidence I've had the last two times, complete with no dry mouth and announced my first choice. They then picked some of the most obscure rep from my list and I was pretty stoked to sing works I hadn't done at other schools. Only problem is, I TOTALLY messed up in one spot.
I know, I wasn't even going to mention it. I literally spent the last hour on the phone with Jim and at various points in the conversation I'd drift back to my audition and a few times I'd even blurt out about how I messed up and I shouldn't focus on it but I am. It's ridiculous. It was a small error, it was still a musical performance, and I was still able to show them what I can do as a singer. And I will never, EVER make that same mistake again, for the rest of my life.
Moving on, at the end they asked me about my teaching, mentioning how interesting it is that I've taught not only private voice but studio voice and a couple classes in all aspects of music. I got the impression they were pretty impressed. :) Then she asked "Why Michigan?" which was really hard to answer. I was unprepared because no one else had asked me anything like that. I composed myself and gave an honest and heartfelt answer that included my desire to have a top notch school on my resume, the reputation of this program, its strong musical theatre program, and how collaboration and performance are such strong foundations. All in all, I think I did well. I sang well, I'm really starting to let the expression come out which only shows more of my musicality, and I hope they like the voice and credentials enough to pay me to go somewhere.
So tonight, as has been the norm, I will find a great little local restaurant, enjoy some wine and delicious food and call it an early night. Tomorrow my flight is later, so I'll get to wander a bit around campus and check out the downtown area some more. Then, pending no crazy delays (which, well... I can't even pretend to guess at anymore.) I'll be home tomorrow night and have the entire day of Sunday to sleep, relax, and feel a sense of normalcy for a day so I can teach one more week, travel one more time, and audition for one more school.
After that, it's just another performance of an opera I'm starring in that I've totally done already, so you know, nbd.
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